also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
