when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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