I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
