I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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