Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
