Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
