bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
