I just cut my nipple shaving
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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