Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
