you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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