Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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