So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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