I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I am full of burrito and curiosity
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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