I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Randomize