gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize