Define "chronic" masturbator.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
well you can't waste a boner
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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