One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
