I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
