You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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