i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
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