Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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