Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
