God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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