Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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