sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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