But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
