I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
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