it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
