If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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