sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
