Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
