Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Randomize
