doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
