**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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