Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.

(740): View more from Ohio

i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..

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(614): good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut. (740): i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck.. http://tfl.nu/ltlc

Replies (37) Good night (5406) Bad night (1264)
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(513): View more from Ohio

sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does

(513): View more from Ohio

i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play

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(513): sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does (513): i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play http://tfl.nu/pxmv

Replies (24) Good night (3768) Bad night (752)
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(970): View more from Colorado

I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.

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(970): I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently. http://tfl.nu/qjfh

Replies (2) Good night (2629) Bad night (855)
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(+61): View more from Australia

Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.

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(+61): Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever. http://tfl.nu/klad

Replies (20) Good night (7438) Bad night (1043)
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(224): View more from Illinois

I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania

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(224): I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania http://tfl.nu/5wck

Replies (14) Good night (2578) Bad night (799)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.

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(267): Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her. http://tfl.nu/ywpc

Replies (23) Good night (1073) Bad night (3247)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.

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(479): As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man. http://tfl.nu/2x85

Replies (2) Good night (981) Bad night (533)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."

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(814): He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van." http://tfl.nu/71uy

Replies (5) Good night (1480) Bad night (602)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun

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(919): You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun http://tfl.nu/syyf

Replies (1) Good night (942) Bad night (530)
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(813): View more from Florida

My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.

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(813): My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester. http://tfl.nu/4ngv

Replies (1) Good night (1210) Bad night (381)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers

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(859): The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers http://tfl.nu/vamg

Replies (0) Good night (1944) Bad night (473)
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(310): View more from California

Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.

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(310): Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure. http://tfl.nu/ptmp

Replies (2) Good night (763) Bad night (408)
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(256): View more from Alabama

We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"

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(256): We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!" http://tfl.nu/7rwd

Replies (1) Good night (543) Bad night (314)
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(330): View more from Ohio

lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow

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(330): lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow http://tfl.nu/f70c

Replies (0) Good night (549) Bad night (388)
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(636): View more from Missouri

You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.

(314): View more from Missouri

You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.

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(636): You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex. (314): You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her. http://tfl.nu/uk7v

Replies (1) Good night (1434) Bad night (388)

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