think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
