i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
