I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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