i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
