Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
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Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
there is glitter all over my balls
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