Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid

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(662): View more from Mississippi

Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.

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(289): View more from Ontario

So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already

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(620): View more from Kansas

The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.

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(740): View more from Ohio

his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.

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(925): View more from California

You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.

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(760): View more from California

I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.

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