How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize