seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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