D3 body, D1 cock
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize