So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
