we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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