grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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