some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
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