Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
