She said her name was "party"
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
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