How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
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