He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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