I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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