The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You were trust falling into bushes
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
